WE LOVE YOU KESHAWN LEE.
Happy 3rd birthday to you my sweet little man.
Sunday, February 12, 2012
To My Littlest Love...
WE LOVE YOU KESHAWN LEE.
Happy 3rd birthday to you my sweet little man.
Labels:
Family
Saturday, February 11, 2012
I Heard Him Say...
“Carry their burdens.” I had just read Gal. 6:2 “Carry one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” I felt very clearly that the LORD was telling me to carry my newly adopted children’s burdens for them.
The children and I were reading 2 Thessalonians 1:3-4 the other morning,
3 We ought always to give thanks to God for you, brothers,[a] as is right, because your faith is growing abundantly, and the love of every one of you for one another is increasing. 4Therefore we ourselves boast about you in the churches of God for your steadfastness and faith in all your persecutions and in the afflictions that you are enduring.
The children and I were reading 2 Thessalonians 1:3-4 the other morning,
3 We ought always to give thanks to God for you, brothers,[a] as is right, because your faith is growing abundantly, and the love of every one of you for one another is increasing. 4Therefore we ourselves boast about you in the churches of God for your steadfastness and faith in all your persecutions and in the afflictions that you are enduring.
I asked the children what they felt that “steadfastness” or “perseverance” might mean. Kiana answered right away “Holding on tight”. (From the mouth of babes, they say).
I have copied one of Mother Theresa’s quotes in my book, “I do not pray for success, I pray for faithfulness.”
All these thoughts were swirling around as I was thinking back to this week, and some of the harder moments that we have had with Noelani and Clive; especially Noelani. This poor child whom I want to love is really struggling, and our days have been rough.
I’m sitting in my bedroom writing this right now, and I gazed out my bedroom window at...
wait, I’ll show you a picture...
It is snowy, icy and cold this morning. Can you see the icy snow sticking to our pine tree? But it’s also a picture to me of the pain and fear that clings to Noelani’s heart right now.
And I think I know what the LORD is asking me ... will I faithfully “hold on tight” and persevere with this little girl; will I carry her burden of pain, fear, bad attitudes and painful choices? Will I stand strong for her in this “cold of winter” till her heart warms up?
“Yes, LORD. Thank you for the promise in Ps. 55:22 that assures me that as I cast my burdens on You, You will sustain me. I can trust You to uphold me. May my new children learn that they can trust me now as they also learn about Your great love for them. Show me how to carry their burdens.”
Amen
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
She Started Our Day....
...crying. I’m ending it in the same way.
My newest daughter, Noelani, was awake and crying at 5:30 this morning. I’ve become familiar with “that” cry. She’s sad and misses her 1st home - China. Sometimes she let’s me hold her, sometimes not. This was a “not” moment. My heart hurt for her as I listened to her grief. Yet, grief is part of our journey also.
Sometimes grief is very ugly though. After her tears dried up, she went into major “Operation Control”. I understand this also; she has lost so much, and it is quite “normal” for an older adopted child to deal with his/her fear by controlling what they feel they can and fighting like heck the things that they can’t control.
So the clock has ticked along today. The battles only took time to “regroup”, and the other children began to react to the stress. Or may be they just thought today was a good day to be naughty. At one point I had six children in “time-in” beside me while I tried to fix supper. Now, don’t think that they were sitting quietly, like angels. There was a symphony of sound - not the relaxing kind!!!!
Steve walked in from work, and I broke. The only words I have to explain it is that I feel raw. Like skin that has had a cheese grater working on it all day....just plain ol’ painful and raw.
So, I cry. And I think back to this morning when her sobs woke me up. She was grieving, and feeling a little afraid of this unknown journey. She’s never done “this” adoption/family thing before and it is scary. Everything that she is familiar with is gone. Everyone she knows is far away. All of the sights, smells and sounds are different. Her feeling become tired and raw.
And mine are too. I feel guilty for not being stronger for us all; handling things better. Then I think, this is part of our dance; part of our story. And though she and I have come from very different places, we are together now. This is our story.
Today, she started our day crying; tonight, I’m ending it crying. She asks me, much as I did this morning, “Are you O.K.?” I answer her with a single word, “Yes”. And we walk our journey together.
My newest daughter, Noelani, was awake and crying at 5:30 this morning. I’ve become familiar with “that” cry. She’s sad and misses her 1st home - China. Sometimes she let’s me hold her, sometimes not. This was a “not” moment. My heart hurt for her as I listened to her grief. Yet, grief is part of our journey also.
Sometimes grief is very ugly though. After her tears dried up, she went into major “Operation Control”. I understand this also; she has lost so much, and it is quite “normal” for an older adopted child to deal with his/her fear by controlling what they feel they can and fighting like heck the things that they can’t control.
So the clock has ticked along today. The battles only took time to “regroup”, and the other children began to react to the stress. Or may be they just thought today was a good day to be naughty. At one point I had six children in “time-in” beside me while I tried to fix supper. Now, don’t think that they were sitting quietly, like angels. There was a symphony of sound - not the relaxing kind!!!!
Steve walked in from work, and I broke. The only words I have to explain it is that I feel raw. Like skin that has had a cheese grater working on it all day....just plain ol’ painful and raw.
So, I cry. And I think back to this morning when her sobs woke me up. She was grieving, and feeling a little afraid of this unknown journey. She’s never done “this” adoption/family thing before and it is scary. Everything that she is familiar with is gone. Everyone she knows is far away. All of the sights, smells and sounds are different. Her feeling become tired and raw.
And mine are too. I feel guilty for not being stronger for us all; handling things better. Then I think, this is part of our dance; part of our story. And though she and I have come from very different places, we are together now. This is our story.
Today, she started our day crying; tonight, I’m ending it crying. She asks me, much as I did this morning, “Are you O.K.?” I answer her with a single word, “Yes”. And we walk our journey together.
Monday, February 6, 2012
Friday, February 3, 2012
This Moment
{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.
If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see.
New sisters - getting to know each other....precious.
Visit Soule Mama to enjoy other special moments with other families.
If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments for all to find and see.
New sisters - getting to know each other....precious.
Labels:
Family
Thursday, February 2, 2012
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, I’M BEGGING - WATCH THIS
Xiaoyun's video was unscripted - she wanted to tell people about the orphans, so we sat the camera in front of her and asked one question "What do you want to tell others?". This is her reply.
Xiaoyun was adopted in April, just days before she turned 14 and would no longer have been eligible for adoption.
Xiaoyun was adopted in April, just days before she turned 14 and would no longer have been eligible for adoption.
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