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"What is your need? Whatever it is, it is entirely God’s concern. He may instruct you in it, and the obedience is yours to carry out; but the provision is His. When given the opportunity to stress self-sufficiency or dependence on God, Jesus chose the latter. Let neither the enemy nor your own limited vision talk you our of dependence on Him. Contrary to the voices in our heas, no need is too small, and none is too large. He is the God of compassion, and the God of abundance, and best of all, He is our Father.” (from my devotional this morning - The One Year At HIS Feet Devotional)
Know what is funny about my devotion this morning?
Last night was a really bad night for sleep. Several of the children aren’t feeling well and I was awake a good part of the night. I thought of the verse in 2 Corinthians 12:9 where the LORD said “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.”
And into my mind popped this;
“Self-sufficient verses Grace-sufficient”.
I spent some time thinking on that and asked the LORD to teach me to be more Grace-sufficient in my daily living.
And then this morning I wake up and read this most perfect devotion. Cool - huh?
Caresse’s current infection is requiring her to be on THREE very strong medications, and this after already 2 months of another medication. She took her new meds last night, and soon afterward was throwing up. She is having such a hard time right now. Her shoulder hurts, but we can’t have the surgery till this infection clears up. This infection is hard to get rid of and seems to be creating new and harder problems. As a mother, I am feeling frustrated for my daughter. And she is hurting and frustrated. It’s hard.
As I look at this “need” for Caresse, I confess again my sin to worry and doubt the LORD, and thank Him for the opportunity to depend upon Him and practice “Grace-Sufficiency” today.
the world called “Childhood”.
Seeing what my children create and imagine is inspiring,
...and fun. And who knew that Legos’ can be game pieces?
Today I’ve been reading from a little e-book called Mindset for Moms (You can find it here.)
Four words stood out to me, but not for the normal reasons that you may be thinking;
“Want what I have.”
I’ve been in this weird “mood” lately.
Kind of unmotivated;
“blah”;
not really depressed, but certainly tired;
may be a little “stuck”.
In fact, I have been finding it very hard to blog. What do I say today? “Ba-hum-bug” with a long sigh.
Then I hear HIM whisper softly “Walk this path that I have given you faithfully, not perfectly, but faithfully.”
Want what I have.
Right now, instead of wanting -
-an answer to several of the children’s learning and developmental problems - embrace the daily life of love and learning that we have;
-instead of wanting grass in the back yard, be thankful for 5 beautiful acres for the children to play in and for my soul to feast on;
-instead of wanting more money to buy certain clothes for us all or fix problems in the house, be grateful for what we have and the MANY people who helps us to have it;
-speaking of money - choose thankfulness for this season to practice simplicity in our lives;
-instead of sadness over yesterdays hurts for some of my children, receive what the LORD has given to us today, with the hope of His good plans for tomorrow;
-instead of wanting Kalyn and Caresse to feel better, accept the LORD’s will for now and rest in that;
-instead wanting to feel more “fire” and motivation; submit to this season in my life.
It’s not that I feel “discontent”; but may be more of a frustrated waiting. Waiting to feel feel passion, purpose and joy again.
And really, as I thought on it, this season that I feel my heart is in is not so unlike the present season here in my Colorado Rocky Mountains. It is still winter here - cold and unpredictable weather, browns lands and frozen waters. Yet, occasionally a birds song or a warm breeze reminds me that soon I will feel the warmth of spring, and see the new life of plants. I long for spring and for the warmth of the sun on my home and in my heart.
And for right now, I hear this LORD tell me;
-You wanted to be married - be faithful to minster to him;
-You wanted children - be faithful in this ministry;
-You want to home educate - be faithful...
“Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet Your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?” (Matt. 6:26)
I tell myself to “want what I have” and embrace this time of waiting and resting. It’s not time to harvest for a new season. It’s time to rest and wait...
with joy...
and with hope.
There was ONE warm hour this week, and I didn’t let it get away. I grabbed my knitting, sat in the sun, and stayed there until the sun went down. It was a wonderful moment of knitting, and watching the children playing around me.
Tomorrow I am taking Caresse to Denver to meet with the special doctor that we have to see for her infection. Please pray for us. Also, Clive has a “funny” sore on his back. Wondering if it might be what Caresse has, but the infectious doctor want even get him in till the end of April (yea, I know - ridiculous).
I am headed into town this afternoon to study a bit on learning “gliches” as Diane Craft calls them. We are seeking the LORD for a few of the children that are having problems in school. By the way, if you want to find out about the amazing ways to help our children through nutritional help, then check out Diane Craft’s Biology of Behavior here. I really believe that we can help our struggling children by supporting them nutritionally and can say that I have seen it first hand.
A phone call from our dr. this afternoon revealed a surprise for us. Caresse has an Atypical Mycobacteria disease. We have to see a specialist in Denver and get her on a different medication to clear this up before we proceed with her surgeries. Not dangerous, but definitely a pain.
Ug.
We had a very refreshing time with Dandy, Gommy and Aunt Karla this weekend. It is so nice to just sit and enjoy time with my family.
Funny how this time of the year brings a longing for warmer weather to my heart. And today didn’t disappoint us. It was around 70 and we enjoyed some outside play time. We have a large water puddle in the back yard from the melting snow. The children are loving that! It is suppose to snow later this week.
Isn’t it horrible about the tornado’s in the south and east? Praying for those effected.
Time for supper. How is your week going? Anything you would like me to prayer for?
loves,
There’s nothing like a birthday to give an excuse for some silly-ness - Big Time. And Landon gave us the opportunity with his 11th birthday. (Isn’t he ADORABLE - and he’s as sweet as he is handsome). We put together and ice cream “cake” (no cake) for him to avoid his food allergies. It was good!
The children like to dress up for birthdays. I never know what they will come up with.
It can get pretty interesting, I can tell you. I need to buy them some bigger dress-up clothes, but for now, they get pretty creative.
Everyone had to take turns trying to do the “funny eye thing.” I’m not showing you the picture of me.
Landon was really wanting this for his birthday, so he was excited.
And this is just to show you what a gentleman my Boo is. Landon holds the title for the most nick-names in this family. It really happened accidentally. Jace was so excited to finally get a brother after 3 sisters that he nick-named Landon his “buddy-boo” when they were little. All these years later, Landon will now answer to “Buddy-Boo, Boo, Boosky, the Booster, Le-Boo, and Boo-Boo”. “Le-Boo-Boo” is what I call him most of the time, and he likes that. It’s my special name for him and he says he always knows how much I love him because he knows he is always his mother’s favorite Boo.
My Vietnamese son, Garett, just sang “Jesus loves me”, in Chinese!
ADORABLE
I asked him how he learned it. Seems Kalyn played it from her computer today for Noelani and Clive, and later, Garett listened to it over and over till he could sing it perfectly.
We worked hard cleaning the house today. We have special company coming in a few days.
Please pray....the infection on Caresse’s hand that has put her shoulder surgery on hold has gotten worse. Tomorrow I take her to a surgery center so that her dr. can do a biopsy on the infection to find our what is going on. (Do you know how many times I have referred to this as a autopsy? My dyslexia is having fun with us). So while it is painful, but O.K. for her shoulder to wait, she was also suppose to have the plate removed from her leg. And THAT does not need to wait. Yet, the dr.s are hesitant to do surgery on any of these things while she has the “weird” infection in her hand.
So we arrive around 7 am in the morning and I don’t know when we will know the results, but I will post as soon as I can.
Thank you all,
and
LOVES,
Shonni
