In our book study, Praying the Names of God, the first chapter on Elohim was easy...I love the LORD's creation and studying about His name as the Mighty Creator was wonderful.
Next came El Roi-the God Who Sees Me...what a comfort it is to reflect on the truth of this Name.
This week our meditation is on the LORD's name, El Shadday.
studying this name of the LORD is not as "warm and fuzzy" as the other two were. As I meditate on God Almighty, my thoughts turn to some difficult times in my life...
-a very rebellious and at times dangerous teenage period;
-dating and almost marrying an abusive man;
-moving to Colorado away from my family...so many mistakes I made as a young woman;
-three pregnancies that were life-threatening to the babies and myself...with each pregnancy becoming more difficult than the last, and realizing after the birth of our 3rd child that we would not be able to have any more children as we had dreamed of;
-several unexpected health issues and surgeries for me;
-the unbelievable stress of an adoption in a foreign country where we were unable to bring home a girl, almost lost our son, and did loose thousands of dollars;
-marriage crisis when I found out about addictions and lies (Steve wouldn't mind me sharing that, so don't worry):
-a real time in my life of being out in "deep" waters and praying that the LORD would save us all;
-the loss of triplets and then the death of twins;
-extreme battles several times to bring our children home;
-a crushing accident to my mother;
and other, more personal things come to my mind.
So why, when I study El Shadday, do these painful moments come to my mind?
What about the good moments, the blessings?
I think for me personally, it is because without God Almighty, my covenant keeping God, I would not have survived many of those times. There were some times I didn't think I would...
But He has shown me in my darkest hours, deepest fears, greatest struggles, driest deserts, and times of despair that He is my All-Powerful God, the One who is able to sustain and bless me, to fulfill every promise He makes. Would I have seen His power, His love if everything always went just wonderful? I want to follow him faithfully, always believing He is enough for me and that His Almighty Power is every working out His will for me and that He will keep His Covenant promises to me. And it is partly BECAUSE of those difficult times that I stand in awe and fear of El Shadday and I believe in His ability and desire to help me.
Times of trials will come...we must believe the TRUTH that El Shadday is mighty to save...I have personally seen it!